Farty's Fortunes

Sunday, 15 July 2007

Mr Farty Gets A Bit Upset

To: GE Money

Dear Sir/Madam,
We have recently received a statement from your company, dated July 9th, alleging that we had not made the minimum payment as requested on the previous statement. We found this odd, since the statement dated June 9th showed a “new balance” of £15, which was payed in full on June 13th via the telephone banking system which I have used on many occasions for this very purpose. This was confirmed by our own bank statement, which showed “call ref. no. xxxx Dorothy Perkins xx” matching the above date and amount.

When I phoned to query this, I was first led through a long series of menu options, then told I would be put through to an “associate“, then abruptly cut off. I called back and spoke, at around 3:30pm, to a human being who, after verifying with my wife that she is the account holder, told me that he did not have access to the account details. This begs the question of why your Sunday hours of business are given as 9am to 6pm if you can only check an account on Monday to Friday.

I told him that the account details were not really important, as we wished to close the account in any case. He then added insult to injury by claiming, and I quote, that “you cannot close your account”. I have never heard anything so ridiculous in my life. Of course we can close the account. Consider it closed as of now.

We will not be making any payments whatsoever. No “£15 Brought Forward”, as that was payed in June. No “£12 Late Payment Charge”, as there was no late payment. And certainly no “71p Interest”.

If you continue to demand money which we do not owe you, we shall set the Office of Fair Trading on you before you can say “Consumer Credit Act 2006”. We take our credit rating seriously and do not wish to have it besmirched by your company’s failure to keep track of incoming payments.

I enclose photocopies of the relevant documents for your perusal and expect a written apology at your earliest convenience.

Yours Sincerely,
Mr & Mrs Farty

Mr Angry and I are not related. But he is my role model.

5 comments:

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

I recently got hit with a £12 late payment charge too. A bit steep, I felt. But when I found the unpaid statement in a box of stuff after moving house, I resolved to keep abreast of my credit card spending online in future.

Have you noticed how ISPs have a link to every possible problem except how to close your account?

Mr Farty said...

Daffers - The first thought that crossed my mind was indeed, "Oh dear, must have forgotten to pay it." It was only when I picked up the pile of paid bills (I never shred them until I've cross-checked them against the next bill) that I found the payment ticked off. And then looked at my bank statement.

My other - and now only - credit card has a Direct Debit for the minimum payment.

Cat said...

Funnily enough, I had a rather unpleasant experience with GE Capital myself. I wrote:

I have a long standing hate affair with call centres, which was not helped by the weekend's events.

Last year I bought a sexy new sofa from DFS with a year free and then two year's interest free credit. When the end of the free year was approaching, I received a letter from their finance company, GE Capital advising me that my direct debits would start on 28 July. Now, the 28th of the month is no use for me since my pay is the last but one day. So, I called the call centre to ask if it could be changed to the first of the month instead. The very nice Indian chap on the phone told me repeatedly that it was not possible (Why?) so I ended up cancelling the DD instruction saying I'd set up a Standing Order instead.

When it came to set up the SO, I rang back the call centre and spoke to a not very nice Indian lady. I failed security as I couldn't recall the exact day I bought the sofa (it was a year ago!) or the exact amount of the direct debit (£22.88, not around £23 like I said) so she wouldn't give me the account details to pay the SO to. Come on - I want to give you money! Finally, after much rage and speaking direct with the DFS store, I thought it was sorted.

Not so. A letter arrived from GE Capital on Saturday via my bank saying they'd received payment but didn't know which account it should go to.

AAAARRRGGGGHHHHH.

(Honestly, useless.)

john.g. said...

You should have written: "I fart in your general direction. You silly English k..nigget". Don't you just love Python?

Mr Farty said...

Cat - Yeah! Banks, eh?

*ahem*

John - Ahahaha! Well done.