Farty's Fortunes

Saturday 25 July 2009

East Fortune Air Show


DSCF4071
Originally uploaded by Farty's Photos
Hah, it looks just like there's a girl doing a headstand on top of that bi-plane! No, wait...

More pictures over at my Flickr page (somewhere in the right margin, look for photos).

Friday 24 July 2009

The Gathering

I like it - apart from the weather.

That one sentence about sums up the visitor experience of Scotchland in general and Embra in particular.

This weekend, clan leaders from all four corners of the globe [Globes don't have corners - Ed.] will meet for the biggest brawl gathering in recorded history. The locals have already started boarding up their windows in preparation.

Bring it on.

The Director's Cut - Shaun of the Dead on Twitter

Lost Liz. Got pissed with Ed. Pete pissed *at* Ed, nearly bit Ed's head off. Everyone a bit bitey. Took Liz to pub for shots. Now Ed's dead.

Tuesday 21 July 2009

Shaun of the Dead on Twitter

ShaunotD:
Listening to The Specials - Ghost Town ♫ http://blip.fm/~8mcy0

ShaunotD:
Sitting @ pub munching hog lumps. @LittlePrincess seems to be upset for some reason. What does exacerbate mean?

answers:
@ShaunotD New A: Go to this URL http://bit.ly/2ClRM

LittlePrincess:
In pub with @ShaunotD @TinyDi @4eyes. Again. #someonekillmenowplease

Email from Twitter to BarbaraMum:
Ed2seconds is now following you on Twitter!

Ed2seconds:
Listening to The Blue Wrath - I Monster http://is.gd/1nviF

Ed2seconds:
Vegetating @ ShaunotD's playing Timesplitters 2 #retrogames

BigPete:
Really pissed with @Ed2seconds. #andidontmeandrunk

NoodleNoel:
d Ed2seconds Got nething? @Eball says u was holding.

Ed2seconds:
d NoodleNoel No man, I've only got an 'enry meself. L8rs!

ShaunotD:
Listening to Kernkraft 400 - Zombie Nation ♫ http://blip.fm/~8rr8y

ShaunotD:
At work. @Ash off sick and made me fucking King of the Zombies

NoodleNoel:
@ShaunotD You've got red on you.

King:
RT @NoodleNoel: @ShaunotD You've got red on you.

Yvonne:
@Shaunotd How are you doing?

ShaunotD:
@Yvonne Surviving.

ShaunotD:
Fuck. Forgot to book anniversary table @ theplacethatdoesallthefish. @LittlePrincess will go apeshit. #hellomynameismud

LittlePrincess:
@ShaunotD Goodbye, Mud!

LittlePrincess has blocked ShaunotD

ShaunotD:
Listening to Chicago - If You Leave Me Now ♫ http://blip.fm/~9dq1i #shuffle

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Lets have @BloodyMary, bite @King's head x2@LittlePrincess stagger back & bang! Back @ bar 4 shots #Howsthatforasliceoffriedgold?

FUCKME:
@ShaunotD Want more followers on twitter? Add more friends the easy way with twadder --> http://bit.ly/e75Ch

Ed2seconds:
RT @BigAl: Dogs can't look up.

ShaunotD:
Singing Grandmaster Flash - White Lines ♫ http://blip.fm/~9a13a

ShaunotD:
Listening to Man Parrish - Hip Hop Be Bop (Don't Stop) ♫ http://blip.fm/~94nyk <- 2nd album I ever bought

BigPete:
@ShaunotD It's fucking Sunday and I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours because every other fucker (read more via Twitlonger)

Ed2seconds:
@BigPete Fuck, yeah!

BigPete has blocked Ed2seconds

Ed2seconds:
@Shaunotd Next time I C @BigPete he's dead. #twatcanttellhiphopfromelectro

ShaunotD:
My Daily Twittascope - The cycle of your life seems to be endlessly repeating itself. Set your sights high today. And you've got red on you.

Ed2seconds:
Morning, tweeps! I could murder a Cornetto!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
BloodyMary is now following you on Twitter!

Ed2seconds:
LOL @ShaunotD snogging @BloodyMary http://twitpic.com/9bgvm didn't take him long 2 get over @LittlePrincess!

ShaunotD:
I just wounded @BloodyMary in an assassination attempt. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

Ed2seconds:
I just assassinated a one-armed bridegroom. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

JeremyThompson:
The attackers can be stopped by removing the head or destroying the brain #notusingthezedword

ShaunotD:
@metpolice Help! Being attacked by really, er, strange people #notusingthezedword

Twitter Status: Problem with All Tweets feed

ShaunotD:
I just assassinated a checkout assistant. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

Ed2seconds:
I just assassinated a random fat bloke. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

Ed2seconds:
RT @King: RT @NoodleNoel: @ShaunotD You've got red on you.

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds I heart @LittlePrincess.

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Gay. #notthattheresanythingwrongwiththat

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds TakeCarGo2MumsKillPhilGrabLizGo2tehWinchesterHaveANiceColdPintAndWaitForAllOfThis2BlowOver #Howsthatforasliceoffriedgold?

ShaunotD:
@BigPete We're going to the pub. If you're feeling better later, you're ++welcome to join us.

Twitter has suspended @BigPete's account in response to unusual activity.

Ed2seconds:
Just borrowed @BigPete's car. Oops, just ran over something...or someone. Meh.

BarbaraMum:
RT Ed2seconds: RT @King: RT @NoodleNoel: @ShaunotD You've got red on you.

Ed2seconds:
Seem to have pranged @BigPete's car. He's going to be pissed #andidontmeandrunk Oh, look! A Jag!

King:
@ShaunotD Are we following you? #cluelessabouttwitter

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
TinyDi is now following you on Twitter!

4eyes:
d TinyDi I'm not going out there.

TinyDi:
d 4eyes I don't want to be torn to pieces and if you think about it, neither do you.

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
LittlePrincess is now following you on Twitter!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
4eyes is now following you on Twitter!

Ed2seconds:
@Niggaz 'sup?

Ed2seconds:
Listening to Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster - Mister Mental http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrROZRbeap8

Ed2seconds:
Goin for a spin in @King's Jag, feelin a bit dizzy LOL

ShaunotD:
Don't think @King was too happy having us in his car. Taking a shortcut now. Tweet later.

Twitter Status: There is a problem - don't panic

ShaunotD:
I just attempted to assassinate @DressingGownBloke, but failed. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

TinyDi:
Trying to teach my tweeps to act like vegetables #easierthanyouthink

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Who died and made you fucking King of the Zombies?

NoodleNoel:
d Ed2seconds You get nething yet?

Ed2seconds:
d NoodleNoel I got nothing, I'm in the middle of something. It's weird.

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds Fuck fucking off! I've spent my entire life sticking up for you and all you ever do is fuck things up (read more via Twitlonger)

ShaunotD has blocked @Ed2seconds

4eyes:
Fuck this for a game of soldiers. Window - say hello to trashcan. #iamsocharltonheston

Trending Topics on Twitter - #twitterfail, #undead, #reanimated, #zombies, #brains, Michael Jackson, #followfriday

ShaunotD:
Going for a run. What did @FUCKME say?

FatZombie:
#followfriday @ShaunotD tasty #brains

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
Wheelchairzombie is now following you on Twitter!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
Oldladyzombie is now following you on Twitter!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
Bikerzombie1 is now following you on Twitter!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
Bikerzombie2 is now following you on Twitter!

Email from Twitter to ShaunotD:
MichaelJacksonzombie is now following you on Twitter!

ShaunotD:
Was really pleased to have 200+ new followers till I found they were all robots #notusingthezedword

ShaunotD has unblocked Ed2seconds.

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Might be a bit warm, the cooler's off.

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds Thanks, babe!

ShaunotD:
RT @BertrandRussell: The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation. <- I think we can all appreciate the relevance of that now.

Ed2seconds:
Listening to Queen - Don't Stop Me Now http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=58CJih1iYC0 #shuffle

4eyes:
I just attempted to assassinate @Queen, but failed. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

ShaunotD:
I just assassinated @Johnlandlord. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Why didn't you just shoot him, man?

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds for the last time, it's OMFG! #needcleanunderwear But dogs CAN look up!

ShaunotD:
I just assassinated @BarbaraMum. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

ZombieNation:
We just assassinated @4eyes. Om nom nom! #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

TinyDi:
Listening to Average White Band - Pick Up the Pieces ♫ http://blip.fm/~9jf1q

ShaunotD:
#fuckadoodledoo @BigPete finally made it to the pub. He looks pissed. #andidontmeandrunk

Ed2seconds:
@BigPete Don't groan at me, you thick fuck!

ShaunotD:
I just assassinated @BigPete. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

ShaunotD:
I just assassinated @CockacidalManiac. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

LittlePrincess:
Going down on @ShaunotD

LittlePrincess:
Oops WITH. Going down WITH @ShaunotD and @Ed2seconds. To the cellar #mindlikegirlonetrack

ShaunotD:
@Ed2seconds I love you, man!

Ed2seconds:
@ShaunotD Gay! #someonekillmenowplease

ShaunotD:
Moving up in the world. Not coming back to this pub. #deadheadcentral #notusingthezedword

Yvonne:
I just assassinated @ZombieTwins. #spymaster http://bit.ly/playspy from Spymaster

Yvonne:
@ShaunotD @LittlePrincess How are you doing?

Shaunandliz:
@Yvonne Surviving.

ShaunotD:
Listening to Queen - You're My Best Friend http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4vQwrHZWWk

Ed2seconds:
Vegetating @ ShaunotD's playing Timesplitters 2 #retrogames



Thanks to Simon Pegg and Ed Wright for the film, Script-o-rama for the transcript and Madhattermommy for the idea.

Monday 20 July 2009

Cramond

Cramond_Inn
So today I grabbed my camera and trotted off down to Cramond to get some photos to keep you from gnawing your own fingers off with boredom. Click any photo to enlarge.

It says here that Cramond was once the site of a Roman Fort. Who knew?
Roman

Yup. Here's some Roman ruins, so it must be true.
Ruins

Legend has it that the Romans brought stinging nettles to Britain with them, so that they could flagellate themselves with them to keep warm. I kid you not.
Log

Although why they didn't just whap themselves with our own native thistles beats me. Beats. Heh.
Thistles

Any road up. Cramond. Popular for the boats and that.
Boats

Not to mention Cramond Island.
Island

There's a causeway connecting Cramond Island to the mainland, but it's a good idea to check the tidal tables before venturing out.
Wet

Ah, well, maybe another time. Oh, look! A pretty boat!
Boat

I love watching the sun reflect off the water. Very relaxing.
Water

Another boat. This one doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Still, it's quite pretty with the trees in the background and that.
Boat

Bye then, Cramond. Shlater!
Cramond

I could totally get a job with the Scotch tourist board.
Birds

Monday 13 July 2009

Computer Terms Illustrated #30 - Updated

I should really put some proper posts in between these, but I rather like this set, which just came to me today. See if you can guess the theme.

Benedict AllenBenedict

The TempestArial

Your brain's so minute, Baldrick, that if a hungry cannibal cracked your head open, there wouldn't be enough to cover a small water biscuit.Edmund

You fat bastard!Chubby

Nice DishDish

Delivery for Mr GriffinMotorbike

Groundhog DayPhil

What's the matter, Watson? Never seen a man in a skirt before?Sherlock

FFS Don't get it wet!Sword

Don't laugh or he'll kill you. Seriously.Centurion

Learn the words!Play

AlbatrossAlbatross

London NewspaperNewspaper

Where The Prisoner was kept, er, prisonerPortmeirion

Updated: Ok, so I've put titles on. Does that help?

Monday 6 July 2009

Computer Terms Illustrated #29

A few to keep the Java coders API...

Superclass
Superclass

Red Hat
RedHat

Phantom Reference
JarJar

Ancestor Listener
AncestorListener

Transformation
Transformers

Tree Viewer
Eagles

Record Store
Record_Store

Log Handler
Loghandling

Sock Puppet
Telecommuting

Clippy
ClippyIt looks like you're travelling via public transport - would you like some help with that?