Farty's Fortunes

Sunday, 5 December 2010

Simply Redilculous

Following disappointing ticket sales for his current farewell tour, Mick Hucknall has apologised to the 1,000 women he's slept with.

In related news, Victoria Beckham has apologised for all the amazing records she's released over the years and Justin Bieber has said sorry for being so butch.

In an outburst of ginger solidarity, Danny Alexander MP, better known by his stage name of Beaker off the Muppets, has jumped on the bandwagon and apologised for sleeping with Princess Leia, Wonder Woman, Xena Warrior Princess and celebrity vagina Katie Price.

When asked to comment, Miss Price said, "Who? Really? If anyone should apologise, it must be me. My only excuse is that I must have been completely off my tits to sleep with a ginger."

Tony Blair is expected to apologise for winning the Nobel Peace Prize any day now. Oh, wait.