Farty's Fortunes

Tuesday 19 February 2008

Holly's Wallabies

Holly and FearneLarge-breasted TV presenter and lesbian match-maker Holly Willoughby had an exciting job in front of the cameras, but her private life was no less busy. For every summer, she would travel to the Australian outback to work in her Aunt Sheila's marsupial captive breeding centre.

a wallaby yesterdayThere she would labour tirelessly, tending to little possums, wombats and that, fattening them up for Europe's top restaurants.

"Strewth, that's a lovely pair of bandicoots you've got there, young Holly," said a grizzled old billabong as he loaded another batch of koalas into the back of a waiting truck with a pitchfork.

Holly smiled and blushed at the compliment, until she realised he was referring to the twin marsupials nestled in the top of her bra for warmth.

Holly and her bandicoots

Milky milky bukkakeOf course, it wasn't all fun and games down on the farm. If the young wallabies took a dislike to the milk she was feeding them, she'd get it right back in her face. (That is milk, isn't it?)


Then one day, disaster struck. I ran out of ideas for this story. The end.

9 comments:

Jahooni said...

Ran out of ideas for a comment. The end. lol ;-)

Kinda turned me on with the last picture ;-)

Memarie Lane said...

LOL the end is the best part!

United Studies said...

Ewwww......

Laurie said...

Both you and Bossy ended your posts with "The end" today. Coincidence or some kind of blogger conspiracy? Hmmm?

Mr H said...

"tending to little possums"

Euphemism of the year, surely.

Sewmouse said...

What Jacki said... only moreso.

Mr Farty said...

Jahooni - Milky milky!

Marie - If you do it right...

Jacki - Hello. And you'll never get me up in a helicopter. Probly.

Laurie - Since I've never heard of this BOSSY person, it must be a coincidence. *cough*

Oh. I remembered to buy your prize today. If it doesn't show up soon, remind me to post it.

Mr H - No, that one's just your dirty mind.

Sew - After a comment like that, I'm duty bound to write chapter 2...

Anonymous said...

she is the sexiest women ever and that last picture was funny

Mr Farty said...

Anon - Thanks. There's a part two somewhere more recent and I'll have to get around to part three soon, that old mine shaft is getting a bit whiffy!