Farty's Fortunes

Friday, 1 August 2008

Scotch Roundup

Boffins have discovered that the world's oldest joke is about my favourite subject. Phew knew?

In China, web censorship remains in place despite promises to the international media that all restrictions would be lifted. I wonder exactly how many hacks will storm off back home in protest? I won't be holding my breath.

Darwin pirateA fourteen-year-old schoolgirl has won the right in court to wear religious jewellery to school, as it's part of her faith. Good for her. I wonder if I can get away with wearing a pirate fish pendant to work on Fridays? Arrrgh!

I was hoping that Tony Hawks would be visiting Embra for this year's book festival, but nae joy. In case you think I've spelt his name wrong, visit the skateboarding section of his website. But not while drinking coffee.

Prince Jug-ears has extended his green credentials by converting his Aston Martin to run on leftover wine. Oxymoron, anyone?

I have yet to be convinced that there's any intelligent life on Earth. Apollo astronaut Ed Mitchell claims that aliens have visited us. Allegedly NASA experts have described them as 'little people who look strange to us' with 'a small frame, large eyes and head.'


Lastly, the gorgeous, pouting Carole Vorderman has kindly written a small post over here for a very reasonable fee. Do pay her a visit and leave some kind comments, please.

Toot toot!


Memarie Lane said...

There's a such thing as leftover wine?

Mr Farty said...

Marie - Only if you own the vineyard.

SpanishGoth said...

Carol V - yeah right, I'll have one up the bottom, and three in the top.

Sex? Was it fuck, she was stuck in the lift for ages

john.g. said...

That makes four, Goth. Can I have the job?

Mr Farty said...

S - Say what?

John - You're hired!

The Freelance Guru said...

Gollum is an Alien? i thought that was just orlando Bloom

VE said...

Gollum isn't evil...he's just not happy about the whole comb-over thing...

Mr Farty said...

Guru - And I thought you knew everything.

VE - It's scary how much he looks like my dad! (Gollum, not Orly)