A Tory think-tank says that northern cities such as Liverpool, Sunderland and Hull are beyond revival and that millions of northerners should migrate to London and the southeast of England, following a massive building program to house them all.
Rather than ruin what's left of the southeast landscape with three million new slums, I would respectfully suggest that we could:
- Build a huge, fortified wall north of Oxford to keep them out.
Or move Hadrian's Wall a bit further south.
- Inundate the North of England, drowning the northerners.
Work in hand, have you seen the news?
- Jack up the cities of Liverpool and Hull and drive them south.
Except that the thieving scousers would nick the wheels.
- Abandon the North to the rats and wolves.
There are no wild wolves in the UK, but we're working on that.
Do you have a better idea?