Farty's Fortunes

Tuesday, 25 September 2007

Where's Sweeney? *



The British Government, in its infinite wisdom (I'm being ironic here), has ruled that henceforth, unmarked police cars are to carry No Smoking signs.

This should not hamper the police in the execution of their duties, according to a spokesman.

Hmmmm. Rearrange these words to form a well-known phrase or saying: Fucking mental are you?

Update: Mr Farty has been suffering from Premature Publication, which may well be the subject of a future post...

Talking like Yoda have I been. Anyway, my point is that we are increasingly being run by a
stupidocracy. How the feck did these people ever get to be in charge of what we can and can't do? It's not like we all live in Burma. Or are these the least worst of a bad bunch? How I wish there was a section on polling forms for "None of the above" - he'd get my vote.

The new ruling also means that anyone caught smoking inside an unmarked police car - stay with me, folks - should be
arrested.

"Yes, I know I already arrested you for VAT fraud, but now I'm arresting you again, for attempted murder. People have to inhale your carcinogenic second-hand smoke, you know! Oh, and attempted suicide. That's illegal too."

One day, nobody will do anything stupid and I'll have nothing to blog about.

But not this day.

* Sweeney Todd = Flying Squad = Undercover Police

13 comments:

Jo said...

Oh so...unmarked police cars are now going to be...marked??

Right, I see their logic.

Sewmouse said...

I want one of those signs for my car, please.

Only littler

Oh, and Goth told me I have to ask you if I can buy Scotland if I win the huge lotto lottery.

So can I? Huh?? please?

Jahooni said...

WHAT THE *&^%!!!!!

BOSSY said...

Shhhh, somebody might read you.

Cat said...

I read somewhere that smoking in cars is going to be banned full stop. Mental.

Mr Farty said...

Jo - Oh, goody. Now you can explain it to me.

Sew - Sorry, one size fits all.

And what makes you think you can buy Scotchland for...how much?

Would you like it gift-wrapped, madam?

J - Quite. I got so enraged whilst writing this post that I hit "publish" wayyyy too early.

BOSSY - Yeah, like that's gonna happen.

Cat - Oh, that's a whole nuther post.

Drama Queen said...

haha! its like the brussels undercover police carrying big blue sirens at all times. . .

john.g. said...

Scotchland? Should get change from a fiver.

Mr Farty said...

DQ - Reminds me og my brother's cat silently stalking birds in the garden...with its bright orange, bushy tail thrashing about like an orange thrashy thing.

John - You can have Glasgow for a quid.

john.g. said...

98p and it's a deal!

Sewmouse said...

HEY NOW

If I get to buy Scotchland, I don't want to be buying one that is all spotted up with bits missing, even if the bits are Glasgow and not necessarily the best bits!!

Put that back!

Honey said...

they do have a "None of the above" section, it's called writing in in fat black ink all over the paper. I was ina count once and saw enough of those. They get counted as 'soiled votes' naturally. sigh
good post

Mr Farty said...

John/Sew - Feck, I've been rumbled trying to sell Scotchland to two buyers. Again.

Honey - Oh, I think you're new here, though I've stalked you a fair bit recently. Please meake yourself at home.