Farty's Fortunes

Sunday, 13 May 2007


Tagged, sort of, by Cream.

Seven random things about me.

  1. I've read Virgil's Æneid in the original Latin.
    Becoz wen u git a Classical educashun u don' git no choice.
    It wiz sumthin aboot a big fight. Lots o' fights. Stick the heid in!
    The only bit I can actually remember was where the adventurers found tables laid out with food and drink, but as soon as they sat down to eat, winged harpies came and attacked them. ISTR Ray Harryhausen made a superb animation of this for Jason and the Argonauts.

  2. I've spent the night with a gay man.
    No, just talking about what we were planning to do with our lives. I don't remember the details, probably because we were pretty stoned at the time, but in the end he decided to emigrate to South Africa as a mining engineer. Hmm...gay man, South Africa, 1980, AIDS explosion just about to happen. I never heard from him again.
    Everyone should have at least one gay friend.

  3. I've won prizes for my computer animation.
    One was of the sun overhead in a blue sky, morphing into the rocket exhaust of a spaceship coming in to land.
    The other was of a giant ant attacking a beach buggy, which then grew progressively bigger until it transpired that the buggy was about to run over the normal-sized ant.
    I miss my Amiga. Sniff.

  4. I've destroyed a pressure cooker.

  5. I've had my pen stolen by Arthur C. Clarke.
    He was signing autographs and when he finished mine, he calmly put my pen in his inside pocket. When I asked for it back, he opened up his jacket and asked, with a cheeky wink, which of the several dozen that he'd nicked that morning was mine? I let him keep it.

  6. I was born with six fingers on each hand and six toes on each foot, but had them surgically removed as a baby.

  7. Number six is a load of bollocks. I do have a pigeon chest, but how boring is that?

If you feel like doing this, meh, knock yourself out.

I'm off to the Canada in a few days, and if my sources are correct they don't have t'internet over there, so it'll probly go quiet here for a bit. Be good to each other.


lettuce said...

can identify with No.4

have hopes about No.2

Don't miss my amiga.

Gaul as a whole is divided into 3 parts.

Thats all.

f:lux said...

I've managed to burn a boiled egg before now so I'm not allowed near pressure cookers...

Canada sounds exciting - have fun!

Mr. X said...

Spending a night with a gay lady is far more fun, we can tell you..oh the stories, our ears were burning, we can tell you!

SpanishGoth said...

They do so have the internet in Canada but I will be mailing a few Canadian buddies to tell them to lock up their pressure cookers.

Sign of your age though - I should be telling them to lock up their daughters....

Cat said...

Re number 5, I had a cigarette stolen (and smoked) by David Gedge of the Wedding Present once. Many moons ago.

Have fun!

rilly super said...

Mr Farty sir, have a very good trip to Canada. I think you will feel very much at home there as I understand that candians all wear shirts of the same design as your blog's background. Thanks ever so for the link, which is lovely, and I have added you too, although I just hope that when people realise you live even futher north than I do that you don't steal my reader off me. Bye for now and go easy on the maple syrup.

enidd said...

enidd misses her amiga. that's her computer, not her spanish lesbian lover.

Timbo said...

Ha, pressure cooker. Ha.

I miss Amigas too. I battered mine to death with an errant joystick. Fucking Rainbow Islands.

BOSSY said...

Arthur C. Clarke - Bossy's read about that condition - he's a KleptoPenomaniac.

Mr Farty said...

Blimey, fan mail. Me likey! I'm going to have to get on t'internet in the Canada, I'd miss you lot too much. Not that Canada is boring - they have coffee and that, according to Non-Working Monkey.

Lettuce - The person who invents a device to stop you sealing the lid on a dry pressure cooker ought to make a fortune.

Gay men seem to have far more fun than straights, don't they? Maybe it's just the extroverts that feel free to proclaim their gayness to the world?

Caesar had a lot of Gaul - Asterix.

F:Lux - Mrs Farty's done that one. Think I'll post some kitchen tips.

X - You do lead an interesting life! I expect to read all about it in your blog, natch.

S - Reminds me of another kitchen tip, ta.

* thinks: are Canadian girls good looking? Shania Twain. Avril Lavigne. Gwen Stefani. Meh. *

Cat - I'm strangely impressed.

Rilly - Er, hellair again! Mwah! Good luck with the builders.

Enidd - Wondered if anyone would pick up on that. You get the gold star.

Timbo - Nebulus was my fave.

Bossy - Har de har har. He's a thieving cunt, but he's British, so you have to forgive him because stealing's in his blood. Australia, South Africa, Canada, the USA as was, Rhodesia. I could go on. Ceylon, India, Hong Kong, New Zealand...

Drama Queen said...

Have a nice time introducing the free world to t'internet. Mind and tell them that its 'SSSSS' not 'ZZZZ'. And that 'colour' has a U in it. They get confused like that.

Mr Farty said...

DQ - I thought that was just Merkans. I get confused like that :-7