Farty's Fortunes

Monday, 2 November 2009

Living In The Future

Busted - The Year 3000.

So I went to the future but it wasn't so great. All of the chicks, although pretty fine, turned out to be my own great-great-great-grand-daughters. Which kinda sucked.

The Earth had had its axis straightened so that we could have BST all year round, but that had melted what was left of the polar ice caps and put all the ski instructors out of a job.

The Earth was, of course, flooded, but that was ok because the scienticians had worked out how to give everybody gills so they could live underwater. Oh, and since people were pretty bored with eating fish every day, they'd bio-engineered squid to taste like chicken.

Oh and Jedward's seventh album had gone multi-platinum, so it was just as well that ears had been done away with. Innit?


Lesley said...

And are there jet packs?? Because having a jet pack would be AWESOME.

Who is Jedward?

I'm glad you came back though. What the hell good is a "present" without Mr. Farty in it??

Nanu Nanu Day Two: DONE!

Mr Farty said...

Lesley - Didn't you even READ yesterday's post? Go to the back of the class. #caughtinmycunningtrap

Maureen said...

What about that whole prune-y skin thing? If they invented gills did they solve that? Otherwise, it would be a world of swimming prunes.

Laurie said...

Some people dream have flying dreams; I've always had breathing underwater dreams. That sounds really cool. I'm with Mo - except for the potential pruny skin part. And the no skiing part. But there's always waterskiing!

Lesley - I used to have a ginormous poster of Mork on my bedroom wall. Talk about geeky.

Z said...

No need to straighten the earth, just let Scotland have a time zone of its very own, surely.

Though have the ice caps melted because of global warming or earth-straightening? Because if it's the latter, new ice caps will have formed somewhere else. On Australia, perhaps?

Lesley said...

Oh crap - WHAT? Backtracking....(and going to back of class).

Mr Farty said...

Mo - We'll get an icthyologist to help with the whole waterproof skin idea. But where can we find a real scientist?

Laurie - Perfect! Can you tell us where we can find an aquatic ecologist? Oh. Oops.

Z - Scotland already has its own time zone, silly. It's called the 1950s.

Lesley - That's better.

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