Farty's Fortunes

Friday, 3 October 2008

And Now I Feel Itchy

So, not much in the news this week, really.

A seven-year-old boy has been thrown out of an Australian zoo for feeding the reptiles...to the crocodile. But hey, haven't we all done that? No? Just me then.

Aggie off How Clean Is Your House admits that she used to work for MI6. Who do think did all the cleaning up after those fights and explosions in James Bond?

Mortgage lender Bradford and Bingley has been nationalised after coming a cropper in the credit crunch. Apparently any speculators who bought shedloads of shares in the company when they bottomed out last Friday, in the hope of making a quick buck after they bounced back up, will now lose the lot. Bwahahaha! Not that I know anyone that stupid. *snort*

A couple of planes got stuck in mid-air after a Lesbian air traffic controller overslept. Her bosses were planning to discipline her for her tardiness, but decided she would probly enjoy it too much.

World War One veteran Henry Allingham, 112, has published the first volume of his autobiography. If sales go well and he collects enough material, he plans to release part two in 2108.

And finally, Cyril, this year's Ig Nobel winners have been announced. My favourite is the Biology Prize awarded to the French team who discovered that dog fleas can jump higher than cat fleas. This is stuff we need to know!

Toot toot!


SpanishGoth said...


Reptiles - no, I always found mammals more squidgy

Bond - Miss Moneypenny

B&B - any fuckwit who thinks bowler hats are a sign of security gets all they deserve

Air Traffic - not like the good old days where you could spot a Pterodactyl

Books - you should look up tunnels when researching dead war people

IG - No we don't

#Debi said...

Yay to Spanishgoth for the Airplane! reference...

Mr Farty said...

Goth - Ah, Miss Moneypenny *sigh*

#Debi - Yay to you for spotting the reference! (It's the pterodactyl one, right?)

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

The secret service is full of Jocks and Geordies. I think they think Johnny Foreigner won't be able to eavesdrop on them.

Mr Farty said...

Daffers - Here's irony for you: Mrs F was born Geordie but saw sense and came to Embra, while her youngest brother stayed behind. When he talks fast, neither of us can understand him. Ya booga.